Why I Love 'Honey, I Shrunk The Kids'

I don't understand the "grade-school boys don't like girls" trope. Maybe I'm strange, but I've always liked girls, even in elementary school. In fact, I think my first kiss was in fourth grade; it was on the playground, and my first "girlfriend" and I were smooching behind the swings during recess. We got in trouble, but who cared? Since then, though, I've gotten more discerning about who and where I kiss.  (What does that have to do with Honey, I Shrunk The Kids? Patience, my friend. It'll all make sense in a second.)

In my young mind, only a few things ranked with girls in terms of greatness: comic books, pizza, and movies. I loved all sorts of movies, but I particularly loved Disney films (just like today). I had a big collection of Disney VHS tapes, and I watched them to death. So, when my mom brought home a copy of Honey, I Shrunk The Kids, I was excited. I immediately popped it into the VHS player and settled in to watch.

Within a few minutes, I was totally invested in the film. I was the most receptive audience the filmmakers could have wished for. Follow the shrunken Szalinski and Thompson kids across the Szalinskis's backyard? That's chicken feed. I would have followed them halfway across the world.

Why? I'll show you:

I was in love. Amy O'Neill, and her character Amy Szalinski, had become my way into the movie. When she danced with her mop, I longed to trade places with the mop. When she almost drowned in the sprinkler water, I was on the edge of my seat. Giant stop-motion ants? Who needed that when you had THIS?

 

Needless to say, I watched that VHS until I wore it out (literally). Also needless to say, my mom was less than willing to buy another copy of the movie. My Honey, I Shrunk The Kids watching was over. 

Flash forward to a couple days ago. I had bought a DVD copy of the movie years ago, but it had been sitting on the shelf, gathering dust. However, I had bought a pizza for dinner, and I needed a movie to keep me company while I dined. My eyes came to rest on HISTK, and I figured, Why not? I hadn't seen it since I was a kid. I popped the DVD into the player and settled back with my dinner. I wasn't in love with Amy anymore (I'm too old to find teenagers attractive), but the movie was still really good! Like, better-than-I-remembered good. 

And that, after that LONG introduction, is what brings us here today: what keeps Honey, I Shrunk The Kids from getting old?

If you're unfamiliar with HISTK, here's what you need to know. Wayne Szalinski, an inventor, lives in a quiet suburb with his wife, Diane, and his two kids, Nick and Amy. Wayne's obsessed with perfecting his shrink ray, which, if it works, will get him a huge grant. Unfortunately, his constant tinkering is putting a strain on his marriage, and the noise is upsetting his next-door neighbors, the Thompsons. The patriarch of the Thompsons, Russell "Big Russ" Thompson, is particularly upset about this. Big Russ also worries about his son, "Little Russ," who doesn't take interest in fishing or football. Instead, Little Russ prefers to lounge around and admire Amy Szalinski from afar.

When the Thompsons's younger son, Ron, hits a baseball through the Szalinskis's attic window, it activates the shrink ray. The ray goes berserk, shrinking everything in sight. The four kids are unaware of this and blindly wander into the attic, where they're shrunk. When Wayne accidentally sweeps the kids up and throws them out with the trash, they must journey across the jungle that is the Szalinski's backyard in order to get to the shrink ray and become full-sized again. Along the way, they fly on giant bees, combat flying sprinkler water, meet giant ants and scorpions, and almost get mulched by the lawn mower.

So, now, we come back to the million-dollar question: what makes Honey, I Shrunk The Kids good? Let's take this one piece at a time:

SCRIPT: Nothing fancy, but there's nothing wrong with that! The screenplay features a solid, sturdy three-act structure. It's easy to see each of the beats the movie hits; in fact, the movie practically announces when its reached the midpoint (it's when the kids reach the middle of the backyard). The story moves along at a decent pace; nothing's rushed, but the film's not boring, either. The dialogue's not dazzling, but there are decent lines peppered throughout the film.

CASTING: Rick Moranis is great as Wayne Szalinski; he treads the fine line between being goofy and being a concerned dad, and he does a good job. The rest of the actors are good enough, I guess. The four kid actors are decent, but they're nothing special. I'm inclined to give more credit to the script for giving us likable characters than to the acting. The actors are watchable, though!

CINEMATOGRAPHY: I was really interested in this. I imagine it must be difficult to light stop-motion scenes and miniatures, and there are a TON of them in this movie. However, the camera crew did a great job. I particularly liked the lighting in the backyard scenes; they were lit and shot as if they were scenes in a Tarzan flick, with the light shooting between the blades of grass and casting shadows. I thought that was cool!

SPECIAL EFFECTS: Oh, how I love stop-motion! I particularly love it when it's used to complement a live-action film; it gives the movie a retro feel, and I love it! This movie features a ton of stop-motion, particularly with all the insects the kids encounter. My favorite SFX scene is the duel between the ant and the scorpion; it's shot and edited in a kinetic, exciting way, and the character movement is so fluid!

MUSIC: I hate to say this, but James Horner could have done FAR better than this. His score strikes me as a little too bombastic and a little too loud. It's trying too hard to drive the excitement home, and it wasn't really working for me. However, this was relatively early in Horner's career, so I'm willing to cut him some slack. He went on to be great, after all!

Overall, I'd say the script is the saving grace of HISTK. It's so solidly structured and packed with likable characters that it carries the parts of the film that are lacking. Is it a masterpiece? No, but it's a lot of fun. If you've got dinner and you're looking for a movie to watch while you eat, it's more than fine! 

Overall Rating:  four out of five stars

What do you think of the movie? Agree? Disagree? Want to laugh at me and my childhood crushes? Go ahead and do so in the comments below!

Emotional Feedback: Why Radio Should Never Die

Casey Kasem in the studio, circa 1984

"Here we go with the Top 40 hits of the nation this week on American Top 40, the best-selling and most-played songs from the Atlantic to the Pacific, from Canada to Mexico! In the next three hours, we'll count down the 40 most popular hits in the United States this week, hot off the record charts of Billboard magazine. Now, on with the countdown!"

If you read that in the voice of Casey Kasem, you're not alone. I read it that way, too! That's the monologue (or a close variation thereof) that Kasem would use to introduce each week's episode of American Top 40. If you were a music fan and lived near a radio station that picked up the syndicated show (and you probably were), you probably came to know his voice well. I know I did! 

I wasn't around to listen to Kasem's first, "classic" run (he left the show in 1988, and I wasn't born until the next year), but I was around for his triumphant return in 1998! I was a constant listener from then until he left the show again in 2004. All of us music nerds owe Kasem and AT40 a big debt; thanks to the show, we kept up with the fluctuations of the Billboard Top 40 chart, and, thanks to Kasem himself, we got an education in pop music trivia!

Kasem is an important figure in the history of radio. Why? Because he did what every radio DJ should do: he helped bond his audience together! 

For instance, throughout the show, Kasem took care to say that these forty singles were being listened to by people all across the country. As I grew older, the idea that millions of people were listening to AT40 and hearing these singles at the exact same time became really potent to me. I was picked on a lot throughout elementary and middle school, and I felt really lonely. The reassurance that there were millions of other music nuts across the country meant a lot to me. 

Looking back, I think that was when I started to fall in love with radio. For the first time, I had made an emotional connection with what a DJ was saying, and I knew that there were others who were doing so, too. That knowledge made the music even better!

Not every radio DJ has the same pull as Casey Kasem had. After all, not everyone has a nationally syndicated radio show. A DJ doesn't have to have something like that, though, to be great. All a jockey needs to be awesome is:

1. a good broadcast voice
2. a working knowledge of broadcast equipment
3. a great personality
4. a passion for music 
5. a love for the audience

The first two qualities can be taught; the other three things need to already be there. Luckily, most disc jockeys have those unteachable qualities, or they wouldn't have tried to be DJs.

What all that means is that every town has at least one good jockey, or one good station, or whatever. It takes a little searching to find them. Luckily, though, once you DO find them, setting a preset on the radio takes maybe two seconds. And it's worth the search and the presetting to get that kind of connection you can get only from a good disc jockey and good programming.

That kind of connection is hard to get from Pandora Radio or an iPod playlist. Don't get me wrong; I use Pandora and my iPod as much as the next person. However, neither of those things can replace the excitement, laughs, and exhilaration that can come from a good DJ and a good radio playlist. For that reason alone, radio should never die!

(Credit where credit is due: shout-out to Rush and "Spirit of the Radio" for giving me the title of this post!)